i quit

Tomorrow is Mother's Day and guess what? I quit. That is what I want for the day. I want to wake up at 11, for the 1st time mind you, not the 3rd. I want to feel a little bit hung over and call a girlfriend to go get a greasy breakfast at a hip neighborhood joint that I have to wait in line for, but it doesn't matter if we wait because frankly I will have nothing else to do. I will get endless refills on coffee, make fun of those around me, standing in judgement because I am not trying to set a good example for anybody. I will use lots of syrup and not Purell my hands. I will decide, at the last minute, to take the dog for a walk, or go to the beach, or have a bloody mary. I will come home and go back to bed. I will wait for the phone to ring with an exciting offer of something to do and then, without asking anyone, I will decide if I want to do it, and not pack snacks when I leave. I think I'll have a beer at 3. Not wine with dinner. I will 2nd hand smoke with no abandon and shamelessly go to sleep without brushing my teeth. I will have sex early in the evening without wondering who may wake up. I will sleep through the night and, in the morning, I will be woken at 6 and realize the previous day was not worth it. why? you may ask, because for better or for worse (most days the better), it's not my life anymore and revisiting it sometimes just makes me homesick. So Happy Mother's Day girls, maybe I'll quit next week...